No longer and not yet

As a music teacher, part of my job is to teach rhythm.  For many students the notes come easy and the rhythm is hard.  For others, the rhythm comes naturally and learning the notes is a battle.   I love teaching rhythm.  I teach the student to verbalize the rhythm, clap it, tap it and play it.  It is easy to make games and make learning fun.  After awhile I let the students tap out the rhythms on their own, looking at a pattern of notation.  I find that one of the hardest things are for students to observe the rests in the pattern.

Silence is a powerful tool in music.  The space between sounds and notes can make one hungry for more.  It can make also make an impact leaving time for one to think about what has come before the rests.  Rests of any length create an energy, stopping the flow of sound.  Without the rests music would not stop from beginning to end.

I have learned a lot about myself in the past couple years.  I actually keep a list to review for a couple reasons:  one, because there has been much to absorb and two, it is hard to remember everything and keep it fresh.  Learning and integrating what I have learned takes reminders.  I have found not all lessons are learned the first time.  Not all characteristics are noted cognitively and internalized in one circumstance.  Not all emotions can be analyzed until the tide of emotion has gone out and thinking has taken place in a more peaceful moment.  Sometimes it takes repeated tries for a new skill or awareness to sink in.  Being human can be frustrating (spoken like  a closet perfectionist)!

One thing I have learned about myself is that I can be impatient much like some of my music students and not want to honor the space between no longer and not yet in my life.

So much can happen in that space.

Processing.  Peace.  Breathing.  Sleep.  Joy.  Being mindful.  Listening.  Forgiveness.  Acceptance.  Silence. 

If I get impatient or excited and want to move to the next thing, or shorten the period of rest to a shorter rest than what is deserved, then I miss the impact that the rest can have in me.  I not only will miss the impact, but might not learn the entire lesson I need to learn.  I am learning that a fermata (a hold) over the rest, the space that is between what was and what will be is something that doesn't stop the growth in my life, but accelerates how cognizant I become of what I am learning.  Resting allows me to be mindful of the lesson and gives me the time to integrate what I am learning.  It forces to me wait on my myself or others and not move on to the new thought, the new habit, the new issue that needs to be addressed.

Some people call this place the waiting room.  Some people call this a plateau.  Some call it a rest.  I call it the place between what was and what is yet to be.  Regardless of what you call it...the value of honoring that space is undeniable.

What Hinders Resonance

In my last post I explored the surface of acknowledging that resonance is created in my life through my communication and the way I live my life.  Moving further, in this post I want to explore what hinders resonance in my life.

Returning  to the examples of what happens in my music studio,  I'll start with the piano because that is the easiest one to explain and imagine.  I described in the last post how the strings resonate and overtones vibrate and resonate if the strings are left unhindered by the felts.  The felts are controlled by a pedal under the piano.  Once the pedal is pressed, the felts rise and every string is free to resonate as a note is played.  A vibrancy of sound and life can be heard and even felt.  Then as I lift my foot, the felts on the strings fall between and surround each string hampering the vibrations.  Only the uppermost octave which does not have dampers (because the strings are shorter) are left to vibrate.  The ear doesn't detect the vibrations as easily on the higher strings as on lower sounding strings. 

I describe that picture so that you can see that I get to control what vibrates.  I choose when I want to give the strings freedom to vibrate and resonate and I choose when to stop the vibration.  On an instrument it's pretty cut and dry.

When you move into the land of the sung resonation, the world shifts.  Sometimes we don't even recognize what hinders the tone from resonating.  It could be many things:  lack of space, lack of support, too much support or physical restrictions impeding the airflow just to name a few.  It takes concentration and awareness of one's own instrument to narrow down what is restricting the vibrancy of the tone and make the changes necessary to restore vibrancy.

I love both examples as I think they both apply to what I call our "life resonance".  Sometimes, we don't feel like resonating with anyone and we shut it down on purpose.  We let the damper pedal do it's work and we choose to cut off the flow of vibrancy within us.  Other times, we try and try to communicate a certain level of energy or connection and we cannot figure out why in the world we aren't coming across to others as we desire.  That leads me to ask what restricts our "life resonance"?  The words in the box above are just a few that describe obstructions to resonance.    As I look at the list, these words not only block resonance, but also can restrict RECEIVING the resonance of someone -but that is for another day's thoughts!

Fear, distractions, anger, closed-mindedness, pain, stress, legalism, tension, impatience, weariness and pushing or forcefulness can be restrictors to open resonation.  They distract us from allowing the balance of the breath, spirit, and open vibration of the tones of our spirit to resonate to those around us.  Personally, fear is a restrictor in my life.  Worrying about what others might think, how I will be received, am I on the right track (whatever that might look like or be)  and a myriad of other negative self-talk squashes my resonance in one fail swoop.  I am slowly learning how to keep that damper pedal depressed so that my fear doesn't override my resonance.  I find that I feel the most healthy emotionally, physically and spiritually when I refrain from giving power to my fears.  I am more self-confident to be who I was created to be if I don't surrender the power of my resonance to fear.

I am learning resonation is a choice.  Consciously or unconsciously my "life resonance" is restricted by my thought patterns and actions.  Sometimes I am not aware of the problem and have to go searching for which restrictor is blocking my openness.  On other days I know full well which control is in place.  My goal is to resonate fully, positively, bringing out the best in those whom I come in contact with in my journey.  I want to stand on one side of the room and for others to feel the positive openness of my "life resonance". 

So this leads me to ask myself frequently and ask you, my fellow sojourner....What blocks your resonation?  Which limits  do you allow to control or are controlling your "life resonance"?